November 12, 2009 The Piano Tuner
What to wear? This is a fundamental question of piano-tuning. As a piano tuner you will be in other people’s beautiful homes, walking across their white carpets, working in their immaculate living rooms or studies. They expect you to be smart, but, on occasion, you need to rummage about in the filthiest of instruments to extract broken parts and repair them. You can either turn the dirty jobs down, take an overall, or keep a large wardrobe of smart but old clothes.
Your first appointment is at nine o’clock. (This leisurely start gives you a chance to answer emails and telephone messages from the previous evening.) As you enter the hall of an elegant townhouse, the smell of fresh coffee greets you. The good news doesn’t end there. The client has just bought a fifteen year-old Yamaha upright piano: a fine instrument in good condition. You have been highly recommended by their piano teacher so you do not have to prove yourself. Clients who have not owned instruments before will stand around the piano and watch you work. They will ask how you became a piano tuner, when pianos were invented, and how they work. This is a great opportunity to show off and a wonderful antidote to the highly skilled but somewhat lonely tuning process. So, allow plenty of time.
Next stop: a converted barn a few miles out of town. You have to walk past a four-wheel drive BMW and a top of the range Mercedes to reach the door. As before, a new client, but this piano that has been bought on Ebay for fifty pounds. On first inspection you reel off a well-rehearsed list of conditions and provisos: ‘When we spoke price on the phone you didn’t say there were six broken hammer shanks. Do you realise that if I repair these, the others (clearly in a fragile state) will probably break too? Because it is so far out of tune it may take a couple of sessions to get it up to pitch,’ and so on. The status of the piano tuner swiftly goes from one that is up with the GP or family accountant, right down to general dogsbody who earns money for old rope, and whose visit is an unwelcome irritation that has to be slotted in between getting children to riding lessons and shopping at Waitrose.
Because you did so much extra work on the Ebay piano, you eat your lunch as you drive to the local jazz venue. The band want the Steinway tuned before they rehearse in the afternoon — and for you to call back before the gig in the evening to check and tidy. You work in the half light as roadies clatter about with mike-stands and ladders, but you’ve tuned it a thousand times before and it is second nature, almost.
In the afternoon you visit an old client, a retired GP for whom you tune twice a year, as regular as clockwork. He is particular, and wants to discuss any tiny problem with the piano. But when you finally iron out any niggles, he is extremely appreciative and you leave feeling highly valued. Many tunings are on pianos for children learning, but amongst adult musicians, Doctors, University lecturers and school teachers seem to rank high in number.
You head home to telephone messages and emails. Piano tuners do not earn enough to employ secretaries and the administrative side of business stretches into the evening — an intrusion that has been eased to an extent by the mobile phone and computer. Usually, your working day ends here as you settle in for dinner with the family. But don’t forget, you must return to check the Steinway for the jazz.
The stage is cramped and you have to untangle the vocal mike-lead and the stage-light from the music desk before you can check the tuning. It has barely shifted. They could have managed without the extra visit, but you can always make some improvement. You spend ten minutes on the top octave. Money for old rope, you wonder? No, money for peace of mind; peace of mind for the pianist who can feel confident that the piano will not reflect badly on her playing. And for you, knowing that if the pianist is happy, you will be asked again.